I walked into the food store the other day and there was a big display of something called "E-Z Break Coconuts". Seriously, this is the stupidest thing I ever heard of. They've taken coconuts and scored a line around the center using some type of power tool making it easier to break open.
Don't they know that a intact coconut is the best thing since Prozac?
When your family has gotten on your last nerve you can drive to the local food store and pick up a coconut or two, depending on your level of stress and anger. Now the fun can begin.
The first thing you do is squeeze the coconut in the vice bolted to your husband's work bench and proceed to attack it with a power drill. Yeah, right in those three coconut eye sockets. Drill, drill, drill. Make lots of noise. Scream if you want because you're neighbors will instantly know EXACTLY what you're up to. At this point you can drain all the coconut milk into that Tom Collins glass that you've prepared with two shots of gin, a wedge of lime and a basil leaf for garnish. It's a concoction I call, "Pit Bull on Crack".
With all the coconut milk drained we get to the main event.........beating the hell out of the coconut with a hammer.
With the E-Z Break coconut the experience just isn't the same. One hit and the party's over.
NOTE: I'm not really here. This is only the cyber-me posting. I'm vacuuming and cleaning refrigerator's at my daughter's new apartment. You know...mom stuff. Leave me a comment anyway, I'll need the cheering up when I get back online. Hooray for Blogger's new scheduling post feature. Sorry that you have to listen to the same music for three days. Turn it off 'cause I don't know how to!