Thursday, August 5, 2010

A Wonderful Guy

A really, really wonderful man has passed away. It's my cousin's husband who has been battling cancer on and off for over 20 years, most of those years pretty healthy. It was only at the very end that he suffered and thankfully that suffering was of short duration.

Gene was the kind of man whose presence in the world made it a better place. He loved, ADORED my cousin. They had a full, fascinating and interesting life. They traveled the world during his career in the military. They lived in some wonderful places and took advantage of all the experiences available to them. The also spent time apart, as he served two tours of duty in Viet Nam and also in the Middle East as a military advisor.

So, there are no regrets, or even thoughts of wanting more. The spent lots of time discussing the end of life scenario. They were prepared! How many people actually face their realities and have those discussions? My guess is not many. The fact that they took these steps made the passage so much easier for both of them.

He was ready to go. She was ready to let him go and he was released from the horrible final days of pain.

I'll miss him as he was a man of great integrity.

Rest in peace Gene.

I'm not actually here this morning. I've scheduled this post ahead of time. My mother, my sister and I are headed down to Tennessee for the funeral. Unfortunately the Farmer cannot go with us.

I've been longing for a dose-of-the-south but this is certainly not how I wanted it to happen. When I am down there I'm certainly going to stock up on Blue Plate Mayo, eat my fill of pulled pork barbecue and visit the family cemetery.

Nesbitt family cemetery.

Hold down the fort around here while I'm gone. Feel free to poke around my archives if you're looking for something to read. Or go over to my photoblog and look at pictures.



Becky said...

This is a nice tribute to your cousin and her husband. They enjoyed their life together! What part of Tennessee are you visiting? We lived 35 miles north of Nashville for 5 years back in the 80's and love the whole state! We visit Memphis any time we get the opportunity....and will be spending a week in Gatlinburg in September. Safe travels and enjoy your visit....even under less than ideal circumstances. Becky

Becky K. said...

I am sorry for this loss in your family. Must be something about the name Gene. My father-in-law was an amazing man too. He was Gene.

No matter how ready your cousin was to let him go she has a long road of grief ahead. Praying that she finds comfort in the good memories and in friends and family.

Becky K.

Donna said...

Sincere sympathies to your family! Your post made me wish I'd known Gene and shed a tear for your cousin's loss. Despite being prepared, she will miss him forever.

Kat said...

It's so uplifting to read about a happy marriage with a happy ending.
No lawsuits, no regrets, no in-fighting--just a good strong ending to a happy life.
I'm sorry that you've lost him, but I thank you for sharing the beauty, too.

Where in the world is Jefferson City, Missouri said...

Sorry to hear of your cousins passing. It was the same way with my mother in law. We were so glad when the pain was all gone. Was their name Nesbitt? I have Nesbitt's in my line.
Have a safe trip.....Your making me hungry.....

Renae said...

I'm so sorry to hear of Gene's passing. Take care of you cousin.
Safe journey.

Vee said...

They sound like an incredible couple your cousin and her husband. Though they were well prepared, I know that there will be grieving work for her to do and I do pray for her comfort. Just knowing that he was ready must be much comfort in itself.

Take care on your journey back to family and all those dear ties...

lifeinredshoes said...

Speaking as someone that has watched a terminal parent pass, I commend you on this post.
When we knew the time for my Mothers earthly life was coming to a close I realized what an oportunity it gave she and to talk...really TALK.
We had the time to remanisce about some of the funny things from the past, tell one another how much we loved each other, and my parting words were that she was still the prettiest mom on the block!
Yes, it is hard to have such candid conversations, but not to seems even worse. When you know the time is short, you don't waste a second. We should all be so lucky.