Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Top Ten Bad Design Elements - What Not to Do, Part Two

Joni at Cote de Texas continues her countdown of the top ten design elements with number two, slip covered furniture.

Joni states that there's no middle of the road when it comes to slipcovers, you either love them or hate them. I don't have any slipcovered furniture. Heck, I'm lucky to have furniture at all.

I understand the concept behind slipcovered furniture but the reality does not appeal to me at all. I'm lucky if I strip the beds and wash the sheets, much less the furniture. I got my fill of pulling clothing off uncooperative toddlers and wrangling the clothes of a coach sounds frustrating.

And putting the slipcover back on the sofa sounds like hell. Do you remember trying to stuff a two-year-old into a snowsuit? Yeah, that kind of hell.

I understand the concept behind the slipcover but it always looks to me like the furniture has been covered with sheets and they're closing up the house to spend the winter in Bermuda.

The fact of the matter is that our home a big jumble of stuff because we combined two households when we created a multi-generational living arrangement.

Last week I listed plastic fruit as my first bad design element. Ugly 1960's candles surrounded by super tacky plastic flowers should be included as a sub-category of plastic fruit.

I had made a brief mention about scary dolls and it elicited quite a response. Yes, I remember those creepy half dolls with crocheted skirts and the ones created to cover toilet paper rolls. I'm happy to report that we don't have any of those in our house, perhaps they didn't survive the move.

We do have something creepier. I can't even think of a name for this:

It's hard to get a good photo because she's on top of a bookshelf guarded by wooden decoy ducks and silk plants. I think she's the mother of those scary big eyed kids in the 1970's art.

Scary dolls are my number two What Not to Do.

Slightly scary dolls under a plastic dome are OK because they can't escape their dome and they're headed to Ebay before they can cause any damage.


Becky K. said...

I cannot stand slipcovers in real life. In a magazine they look fine. All things tucked in as they should be. In my home...nope! They are the untucked blouse that won't cooperate.

This was a very cute post.

Becky K.

Jenni said...

My 17yodd is freaked out by dolls. She was almost in tears over the large bin of dolls at the DAV last time we went. I have to admit that old dolls piled high in a bin is a little creepy and so are those display cases full of dolls that some women keep.

The sad, big-eyed 70s art children really creep me out. They almost always look abused and/or neglected. Why would anyone make that, much less hang it on their wall.

Display cases of Precious Moments figurines should be another item on your list. I don't care for Precious Moments figurines, but one or two here and there aren't so bad. A whole wall of them is frightening.

Jenni said...

Oh! And what about Wonder Mold doll cakes? Does anyone else think those are a bit strange?

Vee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Vee said...

Let me try again...

You had me laughing throughout...

I understand this completely now that I am hauling in my grandmother's things. She wants it; she wants it all. It's not going to happen, but she can have some of it as long as it doesn't inch its way out of her bedroom.

Slipcovers I like...as Becky said, "they're an untucked blouse." That about perfectly describes my style. :D

Anonymous said...

I'm all with ya Sista on the slipcovers. ugh. They NEVER stay in place and look frumpy and wrinkled. Just a pain in the tush as far as I am concerned...

The Blue Ridge Gal

Anonymous said...

Hello - This is BellaDella's Mom.
First let me say that I love your blog:). I am not going to excuse myself nor do I think of myself as weird or "what kind of person would"
really like" what you have shared with us today. I love the dolls and I also like the plastic flower ring. I even liked the plastic fruit. I would give them a home and love them:).

Be quiet Belladaughter and stop laughing. I heard you say "thats my mom".

Have a nice day.


ksarra said...

Another cute post! I wonder what our kids and grandkids will think is tacky when we bring our possessions and move in with them!!! Ha.

lifeinredshoes said...

Oh my, my my.

Suzanne said...

Becky - About the untucked blouse - I think perhaps I'm out of the loop because untucked blouses are also in style - sticking out the bottom of a sweater. All I can hear inside my head is my mother saying, "Tuck your shirt in".

Jenni - Some people feel the same way about clowns. I have a friend who is seriously creeped out by clowns. We gave him one as a gift and quickly discovered that it was not funny - he was really disturbed by it. I'm not fond of any super-large collections. My sister-in-laws display cabinet looks like a Hallmark gift shop.

And....those dolls cakes with Barbie stick out are in the category with the toilet paper cover.

Vee - My mission in life is to find some humor in our condition. I'm certainly happy I could make you laugh this morning. You're going to need it my dear, with your grandmother moving in. They are quite opinionated and they want what they want. It's sometimes the battle of the wills. I'm betting on you but I won't be surprised if I see some strange object in your latest banner photo!!!

Di - It just seems like all that much more work and I really, really don't want to be stuffing cushions into a slipcover.

Janice - Since you're Bella Della's mom I'm giving you special dispensation. Oh heck, everybody can decorate however they please, I know that, but some things just....I don't know. Be careful what you say my dear because you never know when it might appear on your doorstep! Ha. And trust me, that candle and candle ring is WAY UGLIER than any photo could convey.

Kserra - Bite your tongue! I've promised my children in a serious blood oath that I will NOT MOVE IN WITH THEM. I've sworn them to deny any pleading requests on my part. I'm giving them full authority to choose my nursing home! But you're right, they're already rolling their eyes at the stuff that I find cool. To them it's totally uncool..... except my Buddha, of course.

Red Shoes -- My indeed!!!!

Brenda said...

Have never been a huge fan of slipcovers. They always look great in magazines but never in realy life.

Stickhorsecowgirls said...

Just say "no" to slip covers. The dolls truly are creepy, and I cannot have clowns around either. C

Karen Deborah said...

well if you really don't like them they will fetch a good price on e bay they look like collectibles.

Sheri said...

Great blog, Suzanne! And nice to "meet" you! Thanks again for the sheep photo. It really is the CUTEST pic ever!

Rue said...

Good morning Suzanne :)

You made me giggle this morning LOL I have a few Madame Alexander dolls from my childhood that I tried to give Annie and it freaks her out to have them in the room. I never realized how creepy they were until she pointed it out, but they really are! LOL I don't know what to say about the candle except for... yikes!


Mary Rex said...

Wow! I am glad I am not the only one who thinks it is creepy for someone way past the 'playing with dolls' age to be sitting them around like decorations. Unfortunately that would be my mom...and we live together. She makes these faceless Amish cloth dolls that remind me of zombies. Thank goodness I have gotten her to keep them in her room!